There are situations when family life was in crisis, and the husband and wife can not find a common language. We have prepared some tips that will help you to get out of a difficult situation and will tell you how to improve family relationships and learn how to prevent conflicts in family life.
The causes of family conflicts and their solution
Any argument hides the reasons for that are much deeper than those, which you swear. Husband doesn’t take out the garbage? Wife was late for 5 minutes? The guy made a compliment to a new dress? Is it because of the garbage package or a short delay you shout at each other? Not at all. And several million people did not praise a new dress. But you needed to hear something nice from your partner. What lies behind domestic disputes and quarrels, let’s try to understand this article.
Rule # 1: don’t be afraid to take responsibility
A disaster in a relationship there are situations when partners shift the responsibility on each other. In the heat of quarrel the man and the woman Express mutual accusations and not finding the right solutions. It is important to learn how to solve conflicts of family life together, sharing equally the responsibility for them. This will help to reconcile even after a strong quarrel.
If, in response to an insult you hurt your spouse, you are guilty too. It does not matter who started first.
Everyone is responsible for their mistakes or words, and it turns out that in the heat of it you are unable to control their behavior. To admit their guilt or error is difficult, but such behavior testifies to the wisdom women. If you behave calmly, not to throw accusations and insults, and the husband will soon adopt this behavior.
Of course, to take responsibility is not to shoulder all the problems. No, you need to learn to recognize the scale of the problem and how each partner can participate in its decision.
Ask yourself what can you personally do to solve the problem?
Talk to a psychologist
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Rule # 2: don’t hold your grudges and don’t leave a conflict situation in the family without attention
The conflict is not the way to solve the problem, and it is not necessary after a hot scandal to forget his reason. Quarrels arise because of a particular reason, to understand with whom you will get rid of the causes of the conflict and avoid its recurrence in the future.
For example, if the conflicts in family life occur due to bad habits of a spouse, choose an effective way to deal with this problem. Discuss everything with your partner, sharing the roles: what is the cause of the conflict, how can you decide what will each partner’s when you start to solve the problem?
Avoid games on the feelings of the partner, resenting nothing.
If you understand that you have matured a specific claim, don’t be afraid to Express them. And the game in silence and manipulation of the senses do not add partners love. When you want to specify partner on his mistakes, act gently and calmly.
But even if you have a habit of often offended, learn to forgive and still take at least some responsibility for the quarrel on himself. This ability can change your attitude to the quarrels, you will not so seriously to perceive the words and once again he would not provoke a conflict on the basis of their grievances.
Rule # 3: if wrong, admit his guilt
The problem of modern relationships in the inability to “surrender”. For men it is important, when the woman herself admits his guilt. How else to establish relationships in the family, if you are not able to admit their mistakes and ask for forgiveness? After the conflict necessarily say that in the heat was rude and you regret it. Of course, at first, the offended man will accept apologies coldly, but later his heart will melt sincerity.
Rule # 4: learn to accept criticism, be aware of the virtues of his men
The ability to accept criticism is important for women and for men. Imagine that you came to the reception to the beautician, and he said, “Skin is flabby, the Breasts need to be tightened and cellulite away!”. You will come to mind will take offense and immediately start to criticize the beautician?
And with the second half: learn to listen and accept true criticism, which applies to character, and behavior, and even appearance. Of course, in the heat of the moment the criticism may be exaggerated, but at the end of the conflict, be sure to discuss with your partner says it all.
Adequate criticism expressed by the peace negotiating table is not a way to humiliate you or to start another family quarrel. This is a factor that will help in the best way to change you and you will learn about the partner’s attitude towards you and your shortcomings.
Near are drawbacks and positive aspects, which pairs forgotten. Over the years of living together positive actions of men become the norm, and come to the fore shortcomings. To see the good and not the bad, try not to compare your partner with other men. Always remember what you fell in love with your husband or boyfriend, at the same time trying to gently correct those faults with which to reconcile not.
Rule # 5: sex is not the engine of the relationship
Sex, of course, important, but he does not associate partners as well as understanding, emotional connection, loyalty. Do not give in to your desires output, choosing to have sex with multiple different partners. Consumer attitude is today a problem of modern relationships.
Bodily love is one of the forms of manifestation of feelings, but the more you indulge your desires, the insatiable become. You can experiment, making something new in sex life, but becomes dependent. By the way, and manipulation sex is not the norm.
The phrase “you didn’t take out the garbage today sleeping on the couch” will be the occasion for another quarrel in the family later because of hidden conflict.
Rule # 6: the partners have different interests
Marriage, love, relationship is not a reason to forget that men and women may have different interests. Can you not understand the Hobbies of each other, but also to limit the second half too. Show you care by giving your beloved an opportunity to engage and believe in what he wants. Of course, if we are not talking about alcohol, drugs or infidelity.
Rule # 7: learn to say “no” to absurd proposals
If your husband is a tyrant and egomaniacwho wants to read the SMS in your phone and daily minute-by-minute report on your actions, then you should not indulge in such behavior. Such requirements will eventually become global, and your freedom will depend on the will of the partner.
Denying the husband in such things, you will not hurt him, but rather grow in his eyes, showing your character and confidence.
Respect is necessary for a harmonious life two happy people who want to engage in dialogue, and not manipulating the feelings of each other, building family quarrels. Each couple can find a compromise on how to improve family relationships, to find a comfortable common ground, which will not only provide a stable relationship, but also help each partner to change for the better.
Working on family relationships and conflicts in the family, you make happy not only themselves, but others as well. Because a happy family life people can successfully realize themselves in other areas.
Your feelings to the partner will always help you find a solution how to fix it even after a severe quarrel, the main thing — do not turn in deaf-blind-mute, look, together look for the exits and go on compromises.